When everything matters...

This page is all about everything that matter and everything that doesn’t at the same time. It is all about what happens around us and to us, it is what we hear, say, see and do. This page is not designed to judge or cause emotional harm to others, but it is to question why!

Sunday, May 20, 2007

She Is Otter Cute


Little Baby Otter rescued and cared for by BC's Mummy! They think the little Otter is a girl and called it Topaz. Topaz is friendly and love to eat dead chick's yum yum!

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Ready to Thrill 007


All boy's want to be James Bond, but only a few look the part like BC xxxxx

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Angel


Spend all your time waiting for that second chance
For the break that will make it OK
There's always some reason to feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day I need some distraction or a beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
Let me be empty and weightless and maybe I'll find some peace tonight
In the arms of the Angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie

You're in the arms of the Angel;
may you find some comfort here
So tired of the straight line, and everywhere you turn
There's vultures and thieves at your back

The storm keeps on twisting, you keep on building the lies
That you make up for all that you lack
It don't make no difference, escaping one last time
It's easier to believe
In this sweet madness, oh this glorious sadness
That brings me to my knees
In the arms of the Angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie

In the arms of the Angel;
may you find some comfort here
You're in the arms of the Angel;
may you find some comfort here

Where Do Broken Hearts Go

I know it's been some time
But there's something on my mind
You see I haven't been the same
Since that cold November day
We said wee needed space
But all we found was an empty place
And the only things I learned
Is that I need you desperately
So here I amAnd can you please tell me (oh)

Chorus:
Where do broken hearts goCan they find their way home
Back to the open arms
Of a love that's waiting there
And if somebody loves you
Won't they always love you
I look in your eyes
And I know that you still care for me
I've been around enough to know

That dreams don't turn to gold
And that there is no easy way
No you just can't run away
And what we had was so much more
Than we ever had before
And no matter how I try
You're always on my mind
So here I am
And can you please tell me (oh)

Chorus:
Where do broken hearts go
Can they find their way home
Back to the open arms
Of a love that's waiting there
And if somebody loves you
Won't they always love you
I look in your eyes
And I know that you still care for me
And now that I am here with youI

'll never let you go
I look into your eyes
And now I know, now I know

Chorus:
Where do broken hearts go
Can they find their way home
Back to the open arms
Of a love that's waiting there
And if somebody loves youWon't they always love you
I look in your eyes
And I know that you still care for me

Chorus:
Where do broken hearts go
Can they find their way home
Back to the open arms
Of a love that's waiting there
And if somebody loves you
Won't they always love you
I look in your eyes

And I know that you still care for me

For meYou still care for me...

Friday, March 23, 2007

Ever get The Feeling When Somthing Is Not Right?

I have been getting such a feeling with work and a few other things that something is not right. It is the feeling that you are being lied to or being used in some way. Well I have had the suspicion that I am targeted for redundancy after I come back of maternity leave. The reason for this is I have consistently been turned down for training that is directly related to my job three times in a row and they are now just started to be overly critical about my work when there was not a problem before and where training would also improve my competency at work. Then I received information from a number of sources stating that they are going to close my project down (this is only based on rumour as I cannot prove that this information is correct), this would leave a significant hole within the community.

They plan to close down all of the youth projects in my local authority and build one larger centre, expecting young people to travel far to attend a youth project, worker to be employed to work outside as out reach workers to replace these centre projects. What’s the problem you may ask?


Well since they are likely to be replacing the four evening a week building based project to one evening a week outside project, reaching a minority who gather in large groups. Well I will leave the rest for you to reach your own conclusions whether you think this is a good idea, or if it is another local government saving devise, who know this may work, I hope it does. However the groups will still be there and if they are about to cause problems or engage in unlawful behaviour then the workers will with draw.

This information is also heavily denied by local government and I have already been threatened to be reprimanded by my superiors for asking questions about this information, also to go looking for such information to prove what is really going on. We will see in the next 6 monthss if this youth project is closed.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Ugly Duckling Trauma!

I read and article that if you read to your child while in the womb it will help it to recognise your voice and promote it’s development. So I went out and bought some children’s story book to read to my unborn son. So I thought I’d give it a go and read one of my favourite stories the Ugly Duckling. So I’m there just reading the story quietly to myself sitting in a Burger King fighting back the tears as I am reading that the other duck are plucking the Ugly Ducking alive and then he runs away and say’s to himself that he is so ugly he wishes himself dead. If that is not enough towards the end of the story he see other swans and he thinks they are so beautiful he approaches them. At this point he says he does not care if they kill him because he is so ugly! Well there is me sobbing like a ninny into my chips………….

So I am reading Buzzy Bear and the Three Little Pigs out loud in the evening before I go to bed, so hopefully the little one will not grow up to disturbed. Well the baby still has to endure Green Day, Black Lab, Scissor Sisters and D12. I refused to be subjected to classical music especially there is very few pieces that I like.

Like Father and Son!


After showing my mother the most recent scan she seams to think there is already a close resemblance to his dad. I must admit I looked at my mum and asked you can see that from a fuzzy scan picture? Then I thought may be it would be a good idea to get my eyes checked, I hope he looks like his dad as he has beautiful brown eyes. Well we will see how much he is like his dad as he grows up, but one thing is for sure he is going to have a cool little life. As we plan to take him snowboarding, power kiting, mountain boarding and if he wants to mix them all up it is up to him. He will have a Nanny that will knit his jumpers and spoil him rotten and another Nanny who has lots of animals, from snakes, owls, dogs, pony’s, cows, goats and the list goes on. He will be a lucky little boy! One of the long lists of things to do before he gets here is to think of names. I was thinking Charles James C so he has his dads surname but he has the male version of my name as a first name, but I don’t think BC is keen, or Elliot so when he is older we can leave messages on his mobile phone. Elliot phone home, lol, well the quest continues! I am sure we can think of something not to embarrassing for the little one to live with.

It's a Boy!

Well on Valentines Day BC and I found out that we will be having a little boy, after convincing ourselves it will be a girl. When we went to for the scan and we saw that it was obvious that we were having a little boy, though it was a surprise, but I am looking forward to seeing what he looks like and our first cuddle. The scan has told us that our little boy is going to be a big boy he is already over the average length and weighs 1bl 1oz.

This is a good thing as we also found out during the second internal scan that I have the start of pre-eclampsia, which means that the baby will likely to be delivered early. It also means that I will have more scans and more appointments to see the midwife. I am a little scared as the condition is dangerous for me and the baby, but on a lighter note at least they discovered the condition early so it can be monitored closely, I half expected this to happen as it is hereditary and I have a family history of pre-eclampsia. So my advice if you are offered a second internal scan, do it because you will be better prepared and you will know what to expect.

Biker Boy!

Well in trying to cut through traffic and save money, BC has bought back his Bandit (it is a motorbike) from his brother. So I now feel like I have a new tough boyfriend in his sexy leathers.

Friday, December 08, 2006

Scary 3D Scan


Some News!

It has been a while but I did not want to add anything to my Blog until well I had a change to catch up with some friends, far and wide and tell them the news before I announced it to the world.

Well that is the news you say? Well BC and I will be having a baby on June19th 07, it was something that either of us did not expect and has already made a big impact on our lives. The other big news is that my twin sister JC will be having a baby in the early part of June 07. JC and I have shared so much in our lives, for instance toys, presents

and sweet etc…. why not this. It will be good to share this experience with JC and since she is a few weeks ahead of me I will have a better idea of that is going to happen in advance. As to what kind of mum I will make well just have to wait and see.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Leeds Castle Fireworks Display

I thought I’d share mine and new boyfriend’s (BC) evening out at Leeds Castle, Well BC bought tickets to Leeds Castle for me as a treat and the cost about £14.00 so not cheep. Well we got there not too much traffic and we parking was straight forward. We parked up left the car and walked towards the fairground and display area, which again was straight forward enough. So we are there thinking ok well lets teat ourselves to a hot drink and a hot dog type thing. So we went of course to the speciality sausages section as you do! We placed our order and besides the outstanding levels of customer service that we received we walked away with one very sad burnt sausage and two hot drinks. We had a look at the sad fair that they had on offer played a doggy game and won a disturbing deformed boxing dog teddy bear thingy, they went to find some where to watch the fireworks.

Invicta Radio we the PA’s for the evening and so we endured them for a while and a laser show which was unimaginative and repeated it’s self every 5mins. So there we were waiting for the start of the fireworks and listening to Queen for the 4th time and the announcement came on the PA system the fireworks will be displayed in 15mins. 15mins later they came on again the fireworks will start in 20mins. By this point the crowd is getting a little peed off, so this keeps happening and after the 3rd time with the DJ’s delaying the display because they were waiting for the people arriving late getting to display. The crowd became a little more fed up waiting in the cold, it got to the point of the 5th announcement delaying the fireworks a third of the crowd decided to boo them off, which was quite funny, especially as they were annoying anyway. Both DJ’s must have thought oh shit, because there was only one announcement after that saying that the fireworks were starting.


The fireworks were big and pretty being set off over the castle, you could see that the fireworks were expensive. The disappointment came when 20mins into the display that this cloud of smoke filled the air above and other fireworks were getting lost in these thick plumes of smoke. Luckily a breeze came and blew some of the smoke away and the other fireworks could be seen, the display lasted about an hour and a half with continuous fireworks one after another being set off which was cool.

After the display we all made the mad dash to the car, walking back to the car took about 20mins due to the large crowd of 18000, but getting out of the car park took 2hours, by this point BC was a little grumpy and needing the little boys room. We got home about 11 o’clock when we should have got home about 8ish. Needless to say we will probably go to the free local display next year.